So this is what crap on a stick feels like

I thought my first few "loading days" would be awesome. On the HCG diet, you're supposed to eat extra fat for the first 3 days (2 days on some programs). I had it all planned out; baby-back ribs, guacamole, donuts, maybe some cheesecake, fettucine alfredo, you name it. Day 1, and I've had some baby-back ribs, but it was hard to enjoy them. By that point (dinner), I was feeling so full. I think the appetite suppressant has already started. That makes me feel optimistic for the coming days, but man, it makes it hard to get in the fat calories that I need!

The shot this morning wasn't much fun. I wouldn't say I'm "scared" of needles, I just don't like them. I'm okay with getting shots at the doctor's office, but I don't want to see the needle go in. Nooo way. Well, when you're giving yourself the shot, you kind of have to look! First thing this morning, I got the shot ready and examined the tiny little pointy needle. Yes, it's one of those super-tiny shots that people use for their insulin. But I could barely make myself do it! I knew I just neede to suck it up and stab, but I couldn't do it! I eased it in!! Eeew, awful, I know! I'm getting heebie jeebies just thinking about it. But I finally got the medicine in, ok, all done. Get the needle put away. Still figuring out how I'm going to throw them out so that no one gets into them. My mom said junkies wouldn't want these needles, but I bet stupid kids would. And my neighborhood is loaded with stupid kids. In any case, I got it all put away, and before I was barely done, I felt woozy. I guess I got myself too worked up about the shot, and the effect was that "I'm gonna either faint or puke" feeling. It was delightful. I sat down, took it easy, tried to make it go away, and it wouldn't! I called my boyfriend and told him I wanted to go to church tonight instead of this morning, but he said there weren't any church services tonight, just the morning. Ugh. So he offered his usual knight-and-shining armor move and said he was coming to pick me up. I don't know if it was my conversation with him or the fact that I laid down while I was talking to him, but by the time I got up, I felt better. My tummy was a tiny bit sore all day where I stabbed myself, but I'm hoping that was just because I tensed up.

Tomorrow, my plan is to focus on MUFAS (mono-unsaturated fatty acids) as my main fat sources rather than crap. So, avocados, nuts, olives, dark chocolate, etc. Plant fats, as opposed to animal fats or super-sugary fats. Cause all that junk today made me feel icky poo. And I plan to be a big girl about my shot tomorrow morning.

Oh, and my cat just jumped up on my dresser like I wasn't even here! She never does that. Must be chasing a bug or something.

Ok, that's enough randomness from me tonight!